When is it time to cut off the leech in your life?

When is enough enough? When do you put your foot down on bad behavior in your relationships (romantic or not)? Hard questions to answer since things tend to vary depending on the person. Some people would tuck and run at the first sign of trouble, those are not the people im talking to. If your first reaction to a problem this particular post is not for you. However if you’re the person who sticks it out because you can “change him” and then you don’t know when or if its right to leave.

Rule number one: If her doesn’t respect you, repeatedly, then its time to go.

A tiger will never change its stripes, so a man who treats you poorly will never stop once he has started. If he makes you feel stupid or worse calls you stupid, then he is not worth keeping around. If he disrespects your beliefs or morals then Whoa e has to go! When a guy is truly worth your time he will not do those things. He will parise your mind even when you say stupid things, he will support your belivefs (notice I didn’t say he had to agree with them, just be supportive) and he will not talk down to you or insult you by making it seem as if ou are inferior.

**Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission ~ Eleanor Roosevelt. ** Don’t give him permission.

Rule Number Two: A man will treat you the way he treats his mother (or mother figure)

It’s a proven fact (and I say its proven cause Ive seen it come true more than once in my own relationships) your man will treat you exactly the way he treats his mother. Fact: I dated a man who totally ignored his mother, cussed at her when he was ignoring her and made her wait on him hand and foot. He started treating me the same way after a month. Its something my mother has always said and it has always proven to be true.

Rule Number Three: If all of his ex’s are “crazy bitches” RUN!!!!

Not all of his ex’s can possilbly be all crazy bitches or cheating whores. No man is that unlucky, yeah im sure its possible a few of them might have been but not ALL. So the moment he say “no I mean it.. Ive never had a good girlfriend they are all like that” RUN, there is a reason they are ALL like that and chances are better that he is either a douche or a Psycho, than he has dated only whores and bitches.

Rule Number Four: Chicks over Dicks.

If all of your girlfriends hate him (this is even more important when they all hate him for proven reasons) then GTF away from him. if he has managed to piss off everyone that you love than its just wise to tell him to hit the road, not only will staying with him piss off your friends but it will also make fun things like group dates or group outings uncomfortable when all of your friends try to stab him in the neck during dinner.

Rule Number Five: Listen to your heart.

The most important rule i always follow is, listen to your heart. If you know, deep down that he is not the one, then don’t waste your time. Leave him before you hurt him by prolonging the break up. (yes guys have feelings too)

Rule Number Six: If he hits you… Take him grit bowling.

Last rule I swear and steal it from Madea. If he has the nerve to hurt you, by hitting you, pushing you,, shoving you, burning you with a cigarette, throwing you down the stairs, anything at all that is similar to that.  Take a boiling hot pot of grits and pour it over his head just before beating him with the hot pot. (NO I seriously don’t advise violence, mainly cause most guys like this are not worth going to jail over. Just GTFO of the relationship)

Put Your Paws Up Baby.

This post is inspired by a young man who is shaking up the world, Jamey Rodemeyer. I first read about him the other day while on my Role-play account on Facebook (yes I role play... deal with it) and his story touched my heart as well as the heart of my friends and those closest to me. The following post is dedicated to his memory and seeks to reach out to others like Jamie and myself.

If there is one thing in this world I cannot stand is bullies. I was bullied horrifically as a child all the way into my college experience.  That’s right; I was bullied from 1^st grade all the way to today during my senior year of college. It started out from one scrawny red headed girl in my 1^st grade class who thought it was funny that I couldn’t tell time on a regular clock (it always had to be digital) and that I couldn’t tie my shoes. Little did she know I was dyslexic, so it took me forever to learn to do those things, but to her they were easy ways to get people to stop picking on her for her red hair and knobby knees? So she turned friends against me, calling me stupid. Next thing I knew I went through Elementary school with No friends.

Middle school didn’t make things better, I was miserable because I was the one who was teased for various things and to make it worse I ate all the time, Food became my only friend and so obviously I got fat,  Another thing for them to pick on. I also ended up wearing glasses and getting injured during soccer so I walked with a limp. I was teased horribly for this.

In the seventh grade, earlier mentioned Red head thought it would be funny to make the biggest black girl in my class think I had talked smack about her mother. Of course anyone who knew me would have known that now shy and overly quiet me would be the last person to say something but she believed the other girl and so I got my ass kicked. Almost every day in gym I got my ass kicked in the locker room, my throat squeezed my things trashed until I eventually started skipping school. The teachers wouldn’t have that and so it was eventually brought to light in the principal’s office, though at first he thought I was lying. He was black as well and a known racist against whites.

Suddenly High school came and here I was in a new School, A new time and a chance to make things better. WRONG. I was fat, had zits, and walked with a limp and I was a prime target. I was picked on again, even by teachers. It was at this time I developed an eating disorder. Freshmen year, being told (in nicer words) that I was too fat to be in the show choir and too clumsy I was majorly depressed. I started cutting as well and attempted to kill myself once. The razor wasn’t sharp enough and I chickened out at the tail end but I tried it. Things where dark all four years though nobody noticed, I kept it hidden by making great grades and dropping tons of weight (thanks to bulimia) as well as starting a job.

Now I am in college and sadly (because things never change) I am still bullied; only now it’s the age of cyber bullies. Cyber bullies make my skin crawl on many levels, mainly because they are punks. If you don’t have the balls to say what you have to say to my face, then you’re not worth my time so doesn’t waste yours by posting that you want me ingest massive amounts of rat poison.

4 years of college later (and yeah I’m still going, mainly cause I got sidetracked by the bully’s) and I have learned something. It NEVER goes away but it DOES get better. Why? I’ll tell you

People will NEVER change; there will always be people who don’t like you for some reason. If bullies can happen at my 11, ooo a semester Christian college and not stop then they will be everywhere in the world and not stop. BUT don’t get discouraged. You are glorious, you are kind and good and amazing. And individual piece of art created to do something amazing.

 One day you will grow out of being fat or ugly but bullies will never stop being bullies. They just won’t, and that is sad. Not for you but for them. They will never get to know the truly amazing person you are. And you are an amazing person. Bullies have something wrong with them, you’re not the problem. The problem is within them. Your frighten them. Be it because you are talented or smart or pretty, you have something they lack and it eats them up inside but that is NOT your problem. It is theirs. Don’t let them get you down, they are not worth it.

So, just remember. When people get you down, Put your paws up cause you born this way baby and baby the way you were born is fabulous.  Jamey Rodemeyer, I know your in heaven hearing this and so much more. You have inspired many to speak out against bullies in this country, your life was short and I wish I could have known you enough to tell you my story along with the stories of others. Because things to do get better. You will be missed.

Hello Blogger

Hello blog world,

this is not my first blog but it is the first blog were I have been determined to post things that I feel will make a difference. My posts may be controversial and my opinions might not be the same as yours however I do wish to ask that no matter what you may think about what my blog has to offer you, that you please handle all of the information and opinions with respect. I cannot tell you how many people I know who are randomly bullied on their blogs simply because others don't share their opinions. My philosophy is if you cant say something nice or constructive then don't say anything at all, that applies to commenting. SO please before you post something nasty, think. Would you want your parents to see you say something like that?

PS... No Drama Llamas will be tolerated.